Questioning, Defining, Consolidating

At the age of 15, I was really confused as to what I really wanted from life. A strange question in someways, because it doesn't come with options to choose from.
The easiest questions one has to deal with in life are the ones with finite choices. These questions may be dealt with when confronted by various methods such as direct choice, choice by elimination,and even no choice if that's an acceptable answer.
However, open ended questions with no defined choices existing and no time limit with which to answer them leads to perpetual procrastination. The biggest problem is that thinking about such conundrums is that thinking can never find a solution. Thinking fails as it simply creates more and more options as there isn't an incorrect answer, nothing outside the scope of feasibility, and then playing with permutations and combinations of these options creates a nauseous dizzy feeling in your head.
Too much thinking and planning is bad is what I've been told, but old habits die hard. I guess you can't take a wrong decision till you take a decision, so by not taking a decision you are ensuring you aren't doing anything wrong in a way.
Does that mean decisions are gambles?

No they aren't is what I've come to realize. Because even a wrong decision will lead you to a new situation, give you more experience in life and well, at least tell you what not to do. The reason I am focusing so much on wrong decisions is that I don't think there can be any right decision. Everything comes with opportunity cost. Even if I wish I had a million dollars, I can only either buy a penthouse or go an a world tour with a private jet. The solution isn't 2 million. That's just greed talking. I can list an infinite number of other things to expand that list... after all "we all just wanna be big rockstars......."

So anyway, My dad asked me a question many many years ago. And being the brilliant individual that he is, it sort of rounded of all the options to my question quite easily and perhaps would have been a tool for great self-discovery for a person looking to walk down that road and seek an answer.

"Do you want MONEY or POWER or STATUS or AUTONOMY" . Apparently these 4 independently or in combination are the highest possible attainments for mankind.

Looking at this question I feel the same disconnect that I've felt dealing with computer science in theory and in practice. Solving a question of finite state automata never really helped me as a computer professional and a lack of explicit connection. But I've spent a lot of time pondering over this question.

Power is the least appealing. I don't want to be in a position where my actions can influence the lives of others. Apart from the people I really care about, I never factor in emotions in my decisions, thinking of them as a liability inhibiting proper analysis.

Money is necessary but no sufficient. That's the best way I can put forth my opinion on money. How much I can't quantify, but I don't have a lifestyle involving outflows of much magnitude.

Status is also very unappealing to me. Status or recognition or an identity is quite a nuisance because it takes away the amazing gift of anonymity that allows one to have experiences one can't otherwise have. In contrast to getting a lot of people who're nice to you in front of you isn't much of a favourable trade off.

AUTONOMY is quite the gem. Except you need to know what to do with it and how to deal with it. Is absolute freedom really that desirable. Doesn't it automatically lead to a state of self destruction or something like that? Yes Autonomy encompasses adventure, passion, experience and all of it, but it requires a lot of intelligence or a lot of stupidity to handle.

Do I sound confused ? Hmm... have been for long, But I'm 22 and that's time against me to do something productive. I look at a year of work ex and then 2 years of an MBA to figure out things... but my brain is dealing with other issues at the moment.

On a humourous note, one of my closest friends thinks the solution to all my problems is a vacation. Thanks but I can procrastinate for free right here in my room.
PS - I'm not attending my college farewell.... Please mark my Proxy one last time :)